Download Your Favourite Aaron Tan Troll/Gangster Poster Here!

Sorry Aaron Tan, I really cannot resist doing this. Someone have to help you realise your comedic and troll potential before you destroy your life by becoming a career gangster. I know Mr Brown had already gave his support, but more is needed before you can come to the attention of famous movie directors like Jack Neo and Michelle Chong.

I have created a series of Aaron Tan troll posters for everyone to download for free to post on Facebook, Twitter, blogs, forums and wherever else you deem fit.

Each poster comes with a classic Aaron Tan quote:

In Queen's English: "I am issuing you with a warning first"
In Queen's English: "I am issuing you a warning first"
In Queen's English: "Seriously, do I look like I am joking?"
In Queen's English: "Seriously, do I look like I am joking?"
In Queen's English: "Please, you need to grow up first"
In Queen's English: "Please, you need to grow up"
In Queen's English: "My name is Aaron Tan and I am from Bedok Town Secondary"
In Queen's English: "My name is Aaron Tan and I am from Bedok Town Secondary"
In Queen's English: "You will be dead if I find you"
In Queen's English: "You will be dead if I find you"

Aaron Tan deserves a second chance. Let’s help fulfill his dream of becoming a comedic talent in the Singapore entertainment industry. 🙂

SMRT FAIL: Commuters forced to break window for ventilation after train broke down underground

Picture via existentialsoup on Twitter:

Oh boy oh boy oh boy...
Oh boy oh boy oh boy...

After the Circle Line breakdown during rush hours yesterday morning, SMRT failed Singapore again with a seemingly even more severe North-South line breakdown this evening, again during rush hours.

Here’s compilation of some of the best Twitter updates on #smrtruinslives over the past few hours:

@joeljoshuagoh: Yes, commuters stuck in the trains really are being forced to break the windows for ventilation: http://yfrog.com/nu5z99j

@rotoira: We dont even need terrorists to cause widespread chaos. We have SMRT.

@ah_ting_ah: People run from village to school everyday for 2 hours. We need to learn from them

@jacksng: 越想越氣!爛透了SMRT!乘客都缺氧破窗了,反省反省吧!

@danielweijie: Circle Line yest n North South Line today, Singapore Pools now accepting bets for East West Line to fail tmr.

Also, do check out this epic picture my colleague, Bill Loh took in a cab while on his way home today:

Comfort Delgro to SMRT: "Bro, pass some passengers over? I need some business."
Comfort Delgro to SMRT: "Bro, pass some passengers over? I need some business."

Now you know why Comfort Delgro and all the taxi companies were not afraid of falling revenues when they raise their fares a week ago. They just have to wait for opportunities like this when SMRT fail (TWICE, within a week right after the fare hike).

Care Bear FAIL @ Ang Mo Kio Hub

Care Bear FAIL (image via FailBlog.org)
Care Bear FAIL (image via FailBlog.org)

Watch the yellow Care Bear fall off the stage from 0:17 onwards:

Poor thing… but very funny.

Who is Aaron Tan Nina Wantyouonly?

Via EDMW. The Aaron Tan Nina Wantyouonly saga is started by Aaron Tan, an 18-year-old boy gangster who will be going into Singapore’s Boy Home soon. Nina Wantyouonly is the name of his ex-girlfriend.

Singapore gangster, Aaron Tan
Singapore gangster, Aaron Tan

Aaron gained notoriety online by posting a video on Facebook taunting a 14-year-old boy who goes by the Facebook name of Ryanzxc Gobangwall (what’s with all these weird hosehbo names?). In the video, Aaron accused the younger boy of “honging (flirting in Singapore gangster lingo)” his ex-girlfriend, Nina Wantyouonly and threatens revenge.

The video is laced with English, Chinese and Hokkien profanity and contains many off-colour sexual references, mainly directed at Ryan and Ryan’s mother (hence do not watch this video if you are under 18):

Here’s the supposed “true story” of the complicated “love triangle” in the Aaron Tan Nina Wantyouonly saga, via Nina on her own Facebook wall:

This is how’s it goes. Me and Aaron had been together for 7months9days.  The reason we had broke up is because of his attitude, his threatening, his childishness, his back stabbing, trust issues and he jus too over controlling.  The best part is his parent disagree our relationship and (even more worse thing ps I can’t say due to personal) But in other hand I know actually a part of me can’t let go so I give him alot of chances to let change him change himself for the better but he didn’t.  I tried my best to hold on but sorry I did my best because until now Aaron still wanna lie to me and do stuff behind my back which I really hate it. Plus our breaks up had alr cause trouble for both side of parent.  So In order to make him heart die for me I put a fake relationship with Ryan which he also agree. But things get worst, Aaron post things at facebook saying bad thing about Ryan and even videos threatening him?! Then kanna stomp and even in the newspaper.  After that, Ryan , Ryan sister and Aaron have a conversation on the phone. What is the conversation I not sure. That’s why Ryan and Aaron are in a relationship. And that’s it for Ryan and Me. But as for me and Aaron we alr officially SINGLE.  So please stop saying he is my boyf. As for Ryan I wanna say sorry for the trouble cause and thanks for the help And that’s it. If got anymore question, comment I will answer your doubts :3

English fail.

I have trouble reading the Nina’s story, just like I have trouble trying to figure out what Aaron (English, Chinese and Hokkien all fail) was saying in his video.

Btw,

Start of video -> “In 3 days I will be sent to Boy’s Home…”
End of Video -> “In 2 days I will be sent to Boy’s Home…”

Aaron’s Mathematics also fail.

Nonetheless, I do find Aaron’s video pretty entertaining. He has better potential as a comedian than a gangster (a better career choice too). I particularly like his catchphrase in the video, “Priest Lah… Priest Leh…”

Thanks to Aaron, now I cannot get the “Priest” word to stop ringing in my head!

On a side note, here’s another video of a guy mimicking support for Aaron:

FRID – Swedish Accupressure Mat

Something interesting was mailed to me a few weeks ago – a FRID Swedish Accupressure Mat!

FRID Swedish Accupressure Mat
FRID Swedish Accupressure Mat

It came at a perfect time.

Rachel and I swapped room with my sister when Asher came along. My sister had generously offered her room to us as it was more spacious and had room for a baby cot. However, Rachel and I could not get used to the soft mattress in our new room and were suffering from back and shoulder aches in the morning. It isn’t so bad for me; Rachel had it worse as she is still breastfeeding Asher and have to sit all day, straining her back while expressing breast milk.

We gave the mat a try and enjoyed using it very much.

The little crowns look really sharp and intimidating, but actually felt good when you lie on them.It is now a permanent item in our bedroom, shared between Rachel and I. We usually use it when we are lying down to read a book or when we are watching television.

Scary-looking sharp crowns
Scary-looking sharp crowns
The crowns are surprisingly soothing when you lie on them
The crowns are surprisingly soothing when you lie on them
Rachel taking a relaxing nap on the mat
Rachel taking a relaxing nap on the mat

You can find out more on how to use the mat and accupressure therapy via the official website.

According to the seller of the FRID mat in Singapore, the acupressure mat is a modern Swedish creation based on the traditional Asian’s “bed of nails”. The acupressure mat was said to have a great success story in Sweden – less than one year after its introduction, the acupressure mat was awarded “Christmas Gift of the Year” by the Swedish Retailers Association in 2009 and over 500,000 mats were sold in a country with a population of just 9 million.

The word “FRID” is Swedish and means peace, calm and harmony. Here are some positive health effects that FRID boasts of:

Pain relief – Reduces tired and aching muscles in most parts of the body
Relaxation – Gives you an opportunity to relax and recharge
Stress relief – Reduces everyday stress that we experience in our hectic daily lives
Increases blood circulation – Strengthens resistance to disease and promotes wellness
Release of endorphins & oxytocin – Production of the body’s own pain-relieving and happiness hormones

The Secret – The Acupressure Crown

This acupressure crown is made of 100% ABS plastic and might look scary. However, it is the 33 spikes distributed on more than 200 crowns totaling over 6,200 acupressure points that is the secret behind the amazing acupressure benefits of FRID – The Swedish Acupressure Mat.

Ernie is enjoying himself on the mat too
Ernie is enjoying himself on the mat too

The mat is available for sale online via the official website at S$89 a piece. There is a 15% discount if you purchase 2 pieces or more. Delivery is free and each mat comes with a free carry bag. 🙂

Free carry bag to bring the mat around
Free carry bag to bring the mat around

Product Specifications

Color: Lime green with white crowns
Size: 68cm x 42cm x 2.5cm
Weight: 0.5kg
Material (Textile): 100% Cotton
Material (Crowns): 100% ABS-Plastic
Material (Foam pad): Polyethane
Material (Carry bag): Nylon